Cliches, Idioms, and Trite Expressions that Suck
The following list has been adapted and updated from a 2012 blog I started called "I'll Take the Stairs".
"Quitting Cold Turkey" - Hey! I happen to like cold turkey.
"Don't do the crime, if you can't do the time." - Well, people don't commit crimes because they don't think they can do the time. They commit them because they think they can get away with it. You also can't underestimate stupidity and desperation.
"It's always darkest before the dawn." - Sure, this means that it's going to get worse before it gets better, but factually, it's just as dark right before dawn as it is at any other time. Midnight, 2 AM, 4 AM--all the same amount of darkness.
"I could care less." - Actually, you couldn't.
"It's plain to see." - If one more poem or song uses this, I will simply have to kill someone. Although, what bearing does their ineffective word usage have on me? None. But words are all I have. Well, that and mac and cheese. God forbid we run out of mac or cheese.
"It takes one to know one." - No, it just takes an intelligent, keen observer. Idiot.
"It goes without saying." - Who has ever, EVER said this in the history of all mankind and language without still saying it?
"I'd rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I'm not." - None of the people who quote this actually mean it. None. It just sounds good. Okay, maybe Kurt Cobain did mean it.
"Good things come to those who wait." - Not always. Absolutely nothing comes to those who wait, unless you're waiting on someone to call you back about a job application you submitted or, I don't know, you're the second worm that didn't get up so early.
"A watched pot never boils." - Well sure it does. Your triteness does not affect science.
"Dead as a doornail." - Alliteration aside, this is irrelevant because doornails are neither alive nor dead because they are inanimate objects. How about "dead as a dead person"? Oh, I guess that doesn't have quite the same analogical component since you're comparing death to death. Welp, I've got nothing then.
"Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars." - You'd actually just float in the continuum of space...for about 10 seconds before dying, but I see your point. Metaphorically though this is also a poor metaphor because, let's say, if you're desiring to become a doctor and you don't make good enough grades, you'll likely just end up in a nursing home wiping butts. Does that sound like the stars to you?
"Rules are made to be broken." - No one in the history of ever making rules has ever thought, "I hope someone breaks these." Maybe a precocious teen can get away with saying this before breaking and entering, but I highly doubt "rules are made to be broken" will hold up in court.
"The bottom fell out." - This is a poor euphemism for raining because, to us, the sky is the top. Would it not make more sense to say, "the top fell through"? Maybe it's supposed to be from God's POV. But you'd think God could get better flooring up there.
"You only live once." - And what about those who believe in reincarnation? Do they say, "well, we're gonna get a do-over if we screw this one up"?
"The greatest thing since sliced bread." - Oh, so nothing that has been invented since sliced bread is worthy enough to replace this expression? It's been 100 years. I'm pretty sure we can move on.
"Winning isn't everything."/"It's not who wins or loses, it's how you play the game." - False. Winning is the entire point of playing. If you wanted to just exercise your skills, go practice. "Only losers think winning is unimportant", I yell, at my 5-year-old nephew's soccer game.
"Today is my Friday." - False. Today is your Thursday, just like everyone else; you're just taking Friday off. Is it not as exciting to say, "I'm off tomorrow!"? Sounds exciting to me.
"____ in color." - Describing a car by saying, "it's red in color" is some redundant, wasteful nonsense. You don't sound smarter and you don't sound more descriptive. Well, yes, you said the car is red, but I'm having trouble understanding if your 1998 Pontiac Sunfire is red in color or in diameter. Please specify.
"It takes one to know one." - No, it just takes an intelligent, keen observer. Idiot.
"It goes without saying." - Who has ever, EVER said this in the history of all mankind and language without still saying it?
"I'd rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I'm not." - None of the people who quote this actually mean it. None. It just sounds good. Okay, maybe Kurt Cobain did mean it.
"Good things come to those who wait." - Not always. Absolutely nothing comes to those who wait, unless you're waiting on someone to call you back about a job application you submitted or, I don't know, you're the second worm that didn't get up so early.
"The early bird gets the worm." - If that were actually true, I think there would be a lot more birds starving to death.
"When life gives you lemons, make lemonade." - So, if my boss is being irrational or ignorant (let's just say), I'm supposed to...go make lemonade? Or, instead of being a smart ass, I'm supposed to "take the good and take the bad" and just "make the most of it"? I can't solve this without using more cliches! My solution is to just to get a different job. I guess that would be like taking the lemons and throwing them at my boss' head. I don't know, I suck at making metaphors.
"Three's a crowd" - I always thought that was a good thing. You know, "the more the merrier" (another cliche!). If someone says to me, upon my joining their twosome, "three's a crowd", I'd be like, "alright, we're set then!"
"Keep your nose to the grindstone." - Ew. That sounds gruesome.
"When life gives you lemons, make lemonade." - So, if my boss is being irrational or ignorant (let's just say), I'm supposed to...go make lemonade? Or, instead of being a smart ass, I'm supposed to "take the good and take the bad" and just "make the most of it"? I can't solve this without using more cliches! My solution is to just to get a different job. I guess that would be like taking the lemons and throwing them at my boss' head. I don't know, I suck at making metaphors.
"Three's a crowd" - I always thought that was a good thing. You know, "the more the merrier" (another cliche!). If someone says to me, upon my joining their twosome, "three's a crowd", I'd be like, "alright, we're set then!"
"Keep your nose to the grindstone." - Ew. That sounds gruesome.
"More than one way to skin a cat." - Also gruesome--and violent.
"A watched pot never boils." - Well sure it does. Your triteness does not affect science.
"Dead as a doornail." - Alliteration aside, this is irrelevant because doornails are neither alive nor dead because they are inanimate objects. How about "dead as a dead person"? Oh, I guess that doesn't have quite the same analogical component since you're comparing death to death. Welp, I've got nothing then.
"Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars." - You'd actually just float in the continuum of space...for about 10 seconds before dying, but I see your point. Metaphorically though this is also a poor metaphor because, let's say, if you're desiring to become a doctor and you don't make good enough grades, you'll likely just end up in a nursing home wiping butts. Does that sound like the stars to you?
"Rules are made to be broken." - No one in the history of ever making rules has ever thought, "I hope someone breaks these." Maybe a precocious teen can get away with saying this before breaking and entering, but I highly doubt "rules are made to be broken" will hold up in court.
"The bottom fell out." - This is a poor euphemism for raining because, to us, the sky is the top. Would it not make more sense to say, "the top fell through"? Maybe it's supposed to be from God's POV. But you'd think God could get better flooring up there.
"You only live once." - And what about those who believe in reincarnation? Do they say, "well, we're gonna get a do-over if we screw this one up"?
"The greatest thing since sliced bread." - Oh, so nothing that has been invented since sliced bread is worthy enough to replace this expression? It's been 100 years. I'm pretty sure we can move on.
"Winning isn't everything."/"It's not who wins or loses, it's how you play the game." - False. Winning is the entire point of playing. If you wanted to just exercise your skills, go practice. "Only losers think winning is unimportant", I yell, at my 5-year-old nephew's soccer game.
"Today is my Friday." - False. Today is your Thursday, just like everyone else; you're just taking Friday off. Is it not as exciting to say, "I'm off tomorrow!"? Sounds exciting to me.
"____ in color." - Describing a car by saying, "it's red in color" is some redundant, wasteful nonsense. You don't sound smarter and you don't sound more descriptive. Well, yes, you said the car is red, but I'm having trouble understanding if your 1998 Pontiac Sunfire is red in color or in diameter. Please specify.
"You can't judge a book by its cover." - Actually, you can. There are entire professions and departments dedicated to how a cover can sell a book. It's called marketing. It's called using your quick judgment brain (I don't remember. Read Blink by Malcolm Gladwell.) when making a decision. Although, I guess that doesn't tell you if you'll like the book or not. I'm starting to understand the metaphor. BUT ONLY A LITTLE.
"A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush." - The fact that this saying is so old and its meaning so obscured that I had to look it up makes it a bad cliche. It comes from the middle ages when they'd used falcons to hunt and how having that type of asset was better than having 2 birds you found in the bushes, as your prey. The metaphorical meaning is that it's better to have a known advantage, even if it's "lesser", in some way, than to risk it on something bigger and better. Not getting the connection to falconry and birds really. To save myself (and you) some time, I'll just say this one just sucks all around and we need a better expression.
"A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush." - The fact that this saying is so old and its meaning so obscured that I had to look it up makes it a bad cliche. It comes from the middle ages when they'd used falcons to hunt and how having that type of asset was better than having 2 birds you found in the bushes, as your prey. The metaphorical meaning is that it's better to have a known advantage, even if it's "lesser", in some way, than to risk it on something bigger and better. Not getting the connection to falconry and birds really. To save myself (and you) some time, I'll just say this one just sucks all around and we need a better expression.
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