my complicated relationship with self-love
I generally find the concept of self-love to be cringe and unattainable. Ew, I'm supposed to love myself? I'd rather die. Self-love sounds like thinking you always look hot and not letting anything get to you. I couldn't imagine responding to someone that I love myself and that's why I did something. But maybe I could learn to not hate myself. That sounded more attainable. This year has been an empowering year for me full of growth, discovery, and self-expression. Along with that has come mistakes, arguments, lost friendships, failed relationships, a lot of insecurity, self-doubt, and my old friend, self-hate. So this month I have slowly, and very sloppily, tried to reconnect with myself. What gives me light, what makes me me, who am I when I'm not with my friends or a romantic partner, what do I like, what do I want, from life, from myself. When I say this has happened sloppily I mean non-linear, imperfectly, taking two steps back and maybe a half step forward som...